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  • Summer Camp Massacre Kills Thousands

Summer Camp Massacre Kills Thousands

kdk August 19, 2004
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BELMONT, WV It began as a perfectly innocent nature

hike, led by Miss Cynthia Sobcyk at Camp Wichahachee in Belmont. But by the end of the

two hours of studying the minute details of leaves and flowers and trees and insects,

twelve thirteen-year-old campers had quietly and remorselessly taken the lives of

thousands of innocent insects.



At the beginning of the nature hike, Miss

Sobcyk had stopped the group of young boys and instructed them to take a few minutes to

carefully study the smallest details of the nature around them. Her biggest mistake came

in giving them the necessary tools—paper, pencils, and magnifying glasses—and then

leaving them alone to experiment.



Billy Enberg began the merciless

slaughter shortly after becoming bored with pine needles and dandelions. Suddenly

realizing the alternate uses for a magnifying glass, Enberg began using the glass he’d

been given—along with direct sunlight—to start leaves on fire.



But that

wasn’t good enough. He needed something better to burn. That’s when he noticed a

passing black ant. That was his first victim.



Soon, Enberg and the rest

of the campers were ambushing, chasing, and murdering innocent insects in the most

creative ways, totally unnoticed by their teacher, Miss Sobcyk, who had mysteriously

disappeared in the woods—most likely to have a smoke. Ants and spiders alike

unsuccessfully ran for shelter, but they were ruthlessly attacked and massacred by this

team of serial killers. And there was no help in sight.



That’s when Miss

Sobcyk, returned from her mysterious retreat, gathering the campers into a group,

smelling of nicotine. She then led the boys to their next destination, dragging them

away from the scene of the crime and leaving the poor, innocent insects to bury their

dead—or eat them, depending on the species.



Will the killing ever stop?

Most likely not. At least not as long as there is a nature hike at Camp Wichahachee—a

hike where Miss Cynthia Sobcyk leaves a group of mischievous young boys alone in the

woods, armed with magnifying glasses and sunlight. Until Miss Sobcyk retires—or quits

smoking—the deaths will continue.

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About Post Author

kdk

Kristin Dreyer Kramer has been writing in some form or another (usually when she was supposed to be doing something else) since the ripe old age of ten—when she, her cousin, and their two Cabbage Patch Dolls formed the Poo Authors’ Club. After a short career in advertising, Kristin got sick of always saying nice things about stuff that didn’t deserve it—so now she spends her days criticizing things, and she’s much happier for it. Since creating NightsAndWeekends.com in February of 2002, Kristin has spent her life surrounded by piles and piles of books and movies—so many that her office has become a kind of entertainment obstacle course. As if her writing and editing responsibilities for N&W.com weren’t enough to keep her out of trouble, Kristin also hosts a number of weekly radio shows: Reel Discovery, Shelf Discovery, and On the Marquee. She’s also a proud member of the Broadcast Film Critics Association (CriticsChoice.com), the Central Ohio Film Critics Association (COFCA.org), the Online Film Critics Society (OFCS.org), and the Women Film Critics Circle (WFCC.Wordpress.com). Kristin lives in Columbus, Ohio, with her husband, Paul, and their daughter, Anna. She welcomes questions, comments, and fan mail at kdk@nightsandweekends.com.
kdk@nightsandweekends.com
http://www.NightsAndWeekends.com
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kdk

Kristin Dreyer Kramer has been writing in some form or another (usually when she was supposed to be doing something else) since the ripe old age of ten—when she, her cousin, and their two Cabbage Patch Dolls formed the Poo Authors’ Club. After a short career in advertising, Kristin got sick of always saying nice things about stuff that didn’t deserve it—so now she spends her days criticizing things, and she’s much happier for it.

Since creating NightsAndWeekends.com in February of 2002, Kristin has spent her life surrounded by piles and piles of books and movies—so many that her office has become a kind of entertainment obstacle course.

As if her writing and editing responsibilities for N&W.com weren’t enough to keep her out of trouble, Kristin also hosts a number of weekly radio shows: Reel Discovery, Shelf Discovery, and On the Marquee. She’s also a proud member of the Broadcast Film Critics Association (CriticsChoice.com), the Central Ohio Film Critics Association (COFCA.org), the Online Film Critics Society (OFCS.org), and the Women Film Critics Circle (WFCC.Wordpress.com).

Kristin lives in Columbus, Ohio, with her husband, Paul, and their daughter, Anna. She welcomes questions, comments, and fan mail at kdk@nightsandweekends.com.

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