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Bringing Up Boys

tonyc April 1, 2005
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Read Time:3 Minute, 33 Second

Before I tell you about this book, I need to tell you why I read it. Last June I got

married for a second time, and this bride came with a ready-made family of three kids.

Now, I had a couple of kids in my first marriage, so it’s not like I was totally clueless

here. But this gal’s youngest was a boy, and both of my kids were girls. That posed a

bit of a problem.



The little guy had spent maybe—and I’m being nice

here—a whopping six months around his biological male parent. Other than that, he’d been

raised by women. I knew that I was going to need some help on this one. My new

mother-in-law had bought a book to help her daughter raise her son, but it was still on

the shelf—unread.
It was Bringing Up Boys by Dr. James Dobson.




I’d read Dobson’s book on disciplining kids during my first marriage, and

it had some good tips in it. This book was worth a shot.



At this point,

it is my duty as a book reviewer to provide you with something of a disclaimer. Dr.

Dobson is a devout Christian and doesn’t hide that from the reader. He wears it like a

badge of honor and touts some very conservative beliefs. If that bothers you, or if you

already have an opinion of him and his ideals, then you can stop reading now. If you

believe that way, too, you probably have already read the book and can quit here. Should

you fall somewhere in the middle of those two sets of ideology, then keep reading.




In Bringing Up Boys, Dr. Dobson espouses some pretty strange

ideas. Things like there are real differences between boys and girls—and those

differences are good things, and we should embrace them. He explains that there really

is such a thing as right and wrong, and we should teach that to our sons. According to

him, parents are in charge of the house, and the kids, especially boys, should respect

them. He seems to be pretty sure that two parents in the house are better than just one,

and that both parents need to be active in the lives of their young boys in order for

their boys to grow up and be good men. The point is also made that all kids—that

includes boys—will emulate the behavior they see at home. Pretty strange and scary

stuff.



He gives practical tips for how to help your son do better in

school and act better in general. Each chapter of the book ends with a question and

answer session that takes his theories and shows the parent how to put them into

practice. On that hand, it’s a great book.



The book also denounces a

couple of topics in very strong terms. He speaks out boldly for an entire chapter on

homosexuality and the harm he sees it doing to society. Dr. Dobson takes on the feminist

elite of the nation as one of the major reasons for the high number of dysfunctional

males in America. His position on both of these topics is exactly what you would expect

from someone with his background. He also bashes dads that leave their families instead

of staying to raise them. Yes, he’s a fundamentalist, but I’ve already warned you about

that.



If you surf over to Amazon.com and look this book up, the first

editorial review will give you a very slanted and unfair view of the book. Don’t let

that keep you from reading it. This is a good guide to raising a young man. Like any

guidebook, it’s not exact, and it won’t solve all of your problems. It will give you

insight into how boys are wired and what makes them who they are.



Read

the book; use the parts of it that make sense to you, and discard the

rest.



Then go outside and play catch with your son. Or ride bikes. Or

talk to him. Or hit some golf balls with him. Or build a tree house together. Do

something that tells him you love him.

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tonyc

tonycald@gmail.com
http://www.tctheterrible.com/blog/
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