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Queen Camilla?

maryann April 2, 2005
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Read Time:5 Minute, 58 Second

Well, now this is a bit of a

sticky wicket. It seems Camilla has no
choice but to become Queen if and when Charles

accedes to the throne. On
announcing his engagement, Charles said that his future

wife, who is to
take on the title Duchess of Cornwall upon their marriage, would be

known
as the Princess Consort when he accedes to the throne.

But the

British government says that legislation would be required to deny
Camilla her

queendom, and this is a very big deal because then the law would have to be changed not

only in the United Kingdom, but in Commonwealth nations like Canada, Australia and New

Zealand. At least one Member of Parliament thinks that Charles has been less than

aboveboard about this whole Camilla-will-not-be-queen position because Charles knows that

since 1936 the King’s spouse automatically becomes Queen; there is no way around it

unless there is a law passed to the contrary. Charles’ camp insists that Camilla and he

are perfectly content with the “Princess Consort” title and have been aware that

legislation might be needed to effect this. As the law stands now, Camilla can call

herself anything she
wants – Duchess of Cornwall, Princess Consort, whatever – but the

queen thing
sticks.

How much are these two birds costing Her Majesty’s

subjects so they can
make a 35-year affair legal? And what of public opinion?

According to the BBC, the British public doesn’t seem to care much about Charles and

Camilla marrying, with a few saying they wouldn’t mind a public holiday

in
recognition of the wedding, and some don’t care if Charles marries Camilla
as

long as the British public doesn’t have to subsidize her or her wedding. A few feel

Charles should go the way of his uncle Edward VIII and renounce his claim to the throne,

marry the woman he loves and go off somewhere and live quietly with her. In short, if

Edward couldn’t have his wife and the throne, then Charles shouldn’t either. Still

others believe the marriage of Charles and Camilla is a step toward a modern
monarchy

and Camilla should become Queen. And of course, there are those
who wonder how

Charles can head the Monarchy when he can’t even get
married

right.

And what about Philip, Duke of Edinburgh? If I were in his shoes,

I’d be pretty ticked off. I mean, here’s a guy who married the Princess Elizabeth more

than 50 years ago, had to settle for the title of Prince Consort upon his wife’s

accession and has been walking two steps behind her ever since. Is all of this fair to

him? How come a wife can become queen if her husband is king, but a man can’t become

king if his wife
accedes to the throne? And what happens to the Prince Consort if he

should
outlive his wife? What is he called then? The Prince Father? Or maybe he’s

relegated forever to Dukedom while Queen Camilla parades about town. What, a king can

have a queen,
but a queen can’t have a king? Are kings entitled to more than queens?

Sounds like a testosterone issue to me, but I digress.

It seems that

this might be a good time for the British government to get
their act together and

modernize their laws. Without question, the
Monarchy has evolved and the attempt by

Charles and Camilla to get married
is a glaring example. It was even questionable if

a civil ceremony would
be legal, as the 1949 Marriage Act, which “updated” the law on

civil
marriages in England, excluded the Royal Family from civil ceremonies.
(Hey,

here’s an idea – get married somewhere other than England.) But they
got around that

because someone somewhere found some legislation – the
European Convention on Human

Rights and 1998 Human Rights Act – which
apparently does not prevent the royal

marriage. It should be noted that
while the 1998 legislation doesn’t specifically

say Royals can marry in
civil ceremonies, it doesn’t specifically say they can’t.

Ah, there’s the rub. I guess this legislation lumps the Royals in with the rest of

humanity rather than in a class by themselves. Well, it’s a step forward, I suppose. I

guess no one thought to repeal the old law, so there was some confusion for a

while.

But the couple passed that hurdle and out came the stamps bearing

Charles’
and Camilla’s smiling faces. All is right with the world and the

wedding
is on. The couple’s eldest sons, Prince William and Tom Parker Bowles, will

be witnesses to their parents’ wedding. Isn’t that nice? And Charles and Camilla are

going to be married by a Superintendent Registrar who is herself a divorced mother of

two. “I am absolutely delighted that I have been asked to conduct this unique and

historic ceremony,” the SR gushed to the press. Unique and historic – that’s one way to

put it.

The Queen still isn’t going and neither is Prince Philip (can you

blame
him?). But Princes Andrew and Edward and their wives and Princess
Anne and

her husband will be in attendance. Camilla’s dad is going too.
Well, they have to

fill the 30-seat Ascot Room somehow. I understand
there will be 750 guests at the

blessing at the chapel at Windsor Castle. They must have rented some

people.

And what about this low-key business? According to Reuters,

Charles and
Camilla will be driven the few yards from Windsor Castle to the

Windsor
town hall in a vintage Rolls Royce Phantom V, once used by the

Queen
Mother. Wait a minute – didn’t Camilla’s engagement ring belong to

the
Queen Mother? And aren’t Charles and Camilla living in Clarence House,
where

the Queen Mother resided? Am I the only one who sees a pattern
here? I think Camilla

has Queen Mother Envy.

And hey, don’t forget your souvenirs. In addition

to a cheap knock-off of
Camilla’s engagement ring, you can get an official Charles

and Camilla
tankard, made from bone china and decorated with 22k gold. These go

on
sale March 26 at a royal residence near you. So if you’re hanging around
the

Windsor town hall hoping for a glimpse of the bride and groom on their
wedding day,

you may want to pop across the street to Windsor Castle and
get yourself a mug. If

you don’t want to spend £20 for the mug, you can
get an inexpensive key chain with a

picture of Charles and Camilla on it.
There’s also a Windsor Castle plate and the

ubiquitous photo of Charles in
his red-collared tux and Camilla in her red dress, left

hand prominently
displayed on her clutch purse so the engagement ring catches the

light
just so. “Look everyone! I’ve got him!” she seems to be saying through
her

smile.

There’s a tea towel with their faces set against the Union Jack,

but I think it’s ugly (the tea towel, not the Union Jack). There are also t-shirts and

caricature masks of the couple. (Some might think the masks are more attractive than

their counterparts.)

I’m holding out for a replica of Camilla’s wedding

hat.

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maryann

maryann@nightsandweekends.com
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