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PARSONS, KS Single man Tony Victor, a mechanical engineer in Parsons has discovered what he believes is the perfect diet. In a press conference last week, he unveiled his diet plan to nutritionists and members of the international media.
“Um, I just eat a lot of Flakey Frosties,” said Victor, referring to his local grocery store’s generic version of a popular breakfast cereal. “I’ve got it all figured out. If you’ll take a look at this chart, you’ll understand,” he said, producing a large, colorful chart of the nutritional value of Frosted Flakes and milk.
Victor pointed out that a 32-gram serving of Flakey Frosties, along with one-half-cup of milk, provides a number of essential vitamins, including Riboflavin and Niacin, of which nutritionists are still trying to figure out the purpose. By eating a mere two or three bowls of Flakey Frosties each day, Victor provides his body with the important nutrients it needs to maintain some sort of strength and fitness.
Victor first began his research on the popular breakfast cereal when he realized that he hated to cook—and, after moving out of his parents’ home, he no longer had anyone to cook for him. Still, Victor understood the importance of vitamins and minerals in his diet, so he began an in-depth study of the nutrients in breakfast cereals.
“Occasionally, I’ll supplement my diet with macaroni and cheese or even Ramen noodles,” said Victor. “And I looked into other cereals, but I’ve chosen to stick with Flakey Frosties, ‘cuz I like the frosting,” he chuckled.
Victor will admit that his diet isn’t without flaws. And while his complete daily diet keeps him low in fat and cholesterol, it also lacks protein, which he has chosen to supplement on occasion with pork rinds.
Spokespeople from Bright Beginnings, the company that makes Flakey Frosties, are ecstatic about Victor’s research. “Bright Beginnings has been promoting the importance of a healthy diet for years now, and we’re so glad that more and more people are beginning to realize that Flakey Frosties aren’t just for kids. And they’re not just a healthy part of the adult diet, but they’re also a healthy, self-contained adult diet.”
Bright Beginnings is currently working with Victor to publish a book on his new diet. They’re also working with dieticians to develop similar diet plans using their other cereals.
Kristin Dreyer Kramer has been writing in some form or another (usually when she was supposed to be doing something else) since the ripe old age of ten—when she, her cousin, and their two Cabbage Patch Dolls formed the Poo Authors’ Club. After a short career in advertising, Kristin got sick of always saying nice things about stuff that didn’t deserve it—so now she spends her days criticizing things, and she’s much happier for it.
Since creating NightsAndWeekends.com in February of 2002, Kristin has spent her life surrounded by piles and piles of books and movies—so many that her office has become a kind of entertainment obstacle course.
As if her writing and editing responsibilities for N&W.com weren’t enough to keep her out of trouble, Kristin also hosts a number of weekly radio shows: Reel Discovery, Shelf Discovery, and On the Marquee. She’s also a proud member of the Broadcast Film Critics Association (CriticsChoice.com), the Central Ohio Film Critics Association (COFCA.org), the Online Film Critics Society (OFCS.org), and the Women Film Critics Circle (WFCC.Wordpress.com).
Kristin lives in Columbus, Ohio, with her husband, Paul, and their daughter, Anna. She welcomes questions, comments, and fan mail at kdk@nightsandweekends.com.
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Kristin Dreyer Kramer has been writing in some form or another (usually when she was supposed to be doing something else) since the ripe old age of ten—when she, her cousin, and their two Cabbage Patch Dolls formed the Poo Authors’ Club. After a short career in advertising, Kristin got sick of always saying nice things about stuff that didn’t deserve it—so now she spends her days criticizing things, and she’s much happier for it.
Since creating NightsAndWeekends.com in February of 2002, Kristin has spent her life surrounded by piles and piles of books and movies—so many that her office has become a kind of entertainment obstacle course.
As if her writing and editing responsibilities for N&W.com weren’t enough to keep her out of trouble, Kristin also hosts a number of weekly radio shows: Reel Discovery, Shelf Discovery, and On the Marquee. She’s also a proud member of the Broadcast Film Critics Association (CriticsChoice.com), the Central Ohio Film Critics Association (COFCA.org), the Online Film Critics Society (OFCS.org), and the Women Film Critics Circle (WFCC.Wordpress.com).
Kristin lives in Columbus, Ohio, with her husband, Paul, and their daughter, Anna. She welcomes questions, comments, and fan mail at kdk@nightsandweekends.com.
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