Jurassic Park III
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There comes a time in everyone’s life when you just have to sit back and ask, “Why?”

Why, for example, would anyone want to beat a dead, um, dinosaur and produce another Jurassic Park movie? And why, after I forcefully willed myself to fall asleep in the theater while watching the second one, would I watch it?

Perhaps the film company had too many leftover dinosaurs hanging around -- and the company’s CEO’s wife was getting tired of them making messes around the house. And perhaps I was just bored. Whatever the case, it happened, and there’s no turning back.

In Jurassic Park III, Tea Leoni and William H. Macy play Paul and Amanda Kirby, a wealthy couple that bribes Dr. Alan Grant (Sam Neill) into being their tour guide on a chartered flight over Isla Sorna -- the deserted location of the second dinosaur lab. But once they reach the island, Dr. Grant discovers that he’s not just there for a fly-over -- and the Kirbys aren’t just a couple celebrating their anniversary. Instead, they’re a divorced couple on a mission to land on the island and find their son, who had been stranded on the island for eight weeks.

So they crash on the island, and the rest of the movie is dedicated to their attempt to get off the island alive, meanwhile watching the miscellaneous disposable characters who came along for the ride get mangled and eaten in nasty ways.

I guess I shouldn’t be so cruel. Jurassic Park III, to be honest, wasn’t nearly as bad as what I remember of The Lost World. Of course, it could be mostly because the writers gave up on trying to create a plot and just decided to make this movie a cool movie with lots of real-looking dinosaurs. So if you like lots of real-looking dinosaurs, go ahead and check this movie out. Of course, you could also watch The Discovery Channel. The choice is yours.

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