Nine Out of Ten Dentists Agree
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PILLSBURY, ND Once each month, all of the dentists in Pillsbury go out for lunch at Chez Bob’s, their favorite diner downtown. They chat about the business and about their patients and about all of the quirky little things that their hygienists do. They also share tips about dental floss and mouthwash.

This month, they discussed brushing—and nine of the ten dentists strongly agreed that brushing is definitely a good idea.

“I’m all for it,” said Dr. Anthony Garner. “I think everyone should brush every single day—and I tell my patients so.”

“You’re right, Tony,” Dr. Thomas Howell agreed emphatically. “In fact, I’ve been telling my patients that it might even be a good idea to brush twice a day.”

“Ya know what?” added Dr. Timothy Carlyle. “I even give my patients toothbrushes—so they’ll have no excuse for not brushing every day.”

At that point, one of the ten, Dr. Franklin Brewster, who had remained silent until then, spoke up. “What are you guys thinking?” he shrieked. “Are you trying to lose business? You’re just driving your patients away! Brushing every day? Free toothbrushes? You’re making their teeth perfect! They’ll never need dentures! How do you think you’re going to make money? Tony, you have three kids to put through college. And Tim, how do you expect to make payments on your summer home in the mountains?” And he continued on his tirade. Simply put, he was appalled by his colleagues.

The rest of the meal was nothing but one big argument. The nine doctors who were in varying degrees of agreement about brushing continued to try to convince Brewster that brushing was an important part of their patients’ dental health—but he wouldn’t budge.

Their lunch was barely over when Brewster got up and hurriedly got ready to leave. “Gotta run!” he called as he glanced at his watch. “I’ve got a root canal to do! See ya next month!”

After a quick recount, which was taken while the remaining nine dentists waited for the waitress to bring their change, four out of nine Pillsbury dentists still agreed that brushing every day is a good idea. The other five agreed that they’d like to buy a new BMW.

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