|
|
|
|
|
EUGENE, OR Local banker Kenneth Dunbar decided yesterday that, after twenty years of working in the Oregon National Bank’s financing department, he was not meant to work in banking. After a month of thoughtful consideration, he’s decided to make a career move. “I gave them my two-week notice yesterday,” he said, “I’ve realized that I missed my calling to become a ninja.”
Said Dunbar’s wife, Lorraine, “I was quite shocked. I’m not sure how a ninja can support a family of four, but Bobby, Kenny, Jr., and I support him 100%.”
When asked what, exactly, a ninja does, Dunbar was a bit baffled. “Um, I’m buying a black suit and a really big sword. I, uh, think I’m going to start by hanging out in a lot of dark alleys, waiting for evildoers to wreak havoc.” He is now taking beginning ninja courses at the Eugene University of Ninja. “I just can’t believe that I’ve been living five miles away from this school all my life, and it took my until now to say, ‘Hey, Ken! You should be a ninja!’”
Everett Rogers, mayor of the City of Eugene, is excited about the prospects of a local ninja. “You never know what kind of unspeakable trouble we’ll be able to prevent by having a ninja around town. Eugene’s been a pretty peaceful town, but any town can always use a good ninja. He’ll be great for birthday parties, too. The kids love ninjas.”
As Dunbar’s last day at the bank nears, he looks forward to going to school full time. He’ll graduate next December. From that time on, he anticipates a long career, foiling bad guys’ diabolical plans and keeping the city safe. Dunbar commented this afternoon, “I’m also thinking that I’d like to have my own TV show.”
|
|
|
|
