Aeon Flux Review
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I’ve never walked out of a film. If I'm sitting in the theatre and what’s on the screen starts to really stink, I do my best to try and nod off. I didn't fall asleep in Aeon Flux, but that's only because the seats weren't very comfortable.

First impressions count for a lot. When a film starts with a chunk of onscreen text explaining the setup, or a voiceover doing the same, I take it to mean the director/writer couldn't fit that information into the plot, which isn't a good sign. Aeon Flux had both.

There is a plot, but it's paper-thin. Nearly all of humanity has died, blah blah blah, survivors living in a walled city where nothing is as it seems, sinister government, heroic rebellion, innocent bystanders I need to go on? At the center of this standard sci-fi vision of the future is Aeon Flux (Charlize Theron), a superhuman assassin who takes life far too seriously. There's also the Handler (Frances McDormand), whose role is never really explained. (And why is she having such a bad hair day when everyone else is a supermodel?)

All action films need a healthy supply of inept guards and dim-witted henchmen—cannon fodder for the hero. Aeon Flux has bucket loads of these. And there is also the “impregnable” building that just happens to have a big hole in the roof, right above the room our hero has to try and “penetrate.”

All of the scenes look like a photo shoot from the style magazine “The Face.” People wear impractical clothing and sit on impractical furniture. No one seems to have a job, except the inept guards. And I guess it must rain donuts or something, because during all the aerial shots of the city I couldn't see anywhere to grow that pesky stuff we call food. Does this film have any redeeming qualities? Let me think...yes, I've got one: it wasn't very long. As for the acting, there isn't any, with only two facial expressions in the whole movie—serious and more serious.

I know sci-fi requires a suspension of disbelief, but Aeon Flux takes that idea, chews it up, spits it out and stamps on it. If you do go to see this film, do yourself a favour and take a pillow.

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