Instructions My Bosses Gave Me on My First Seven Jobs
SEARCH IN  
Click here to buy posters
In Association with Amazon.com
 
  
ORDER THIS POSTER
BUY THE POSTER  
 
1. Mistakes cost us, so get the order right. If Stacy gets backed up on french fries, give her a hand. If you see mayonnaise thatís gone hard, throw it out. Donít use it. Donít forget to wash your hands after you empty the trash. If you see puke or diapers on the floor, get the mop and bucket. Wash your hands after.

2. Keep hammering. Yeah, I know itís like an oven up here already, but weíve got another job this afternoon, so letís move, move, move! One more thing. You fall to the ground, I donít care if you fall thirty feet or a hundred and thirty feet, you get right back up here and start hammering. And no screwing around down there and taking a drink of water.

3. I donít turn off or slow down the stuffer for nobody. I got a quota to meet, and Iím meeting it. One time a woman got her hair caught in the belt, and thatís the only time I turned it off. Just long enough for her to cut her hair free, then right back up to max. For all I know we mailed her hair to a taxpayer. You get your necktie stuck in there, you keep loading forms in the feeder until you choke, got me?

  
 
4. Do a strip exam when they come in. Make a note of any bruises or injuries, so no one can come back later and say we caused them. Put all their belongings in a 30-gallon trash bag and store it in the basement. Tell them anything they donít store in the basement will be stolen, and we arenít responsible. If they donít have a change of clothes, issue them some clean socks and underwear if we have any, and write them a pass for the laundry to check our clothing donations. Assign them to a bed. Issue them one towel and one bar of soap and one razor and one tube of deodorant. Tell them they have to shower once a day. Show them where the mess room is. If they start acting funny or attack you, let the nurse know, and sheíll give them a shot thatíll knock them right out.

5. Stay in flow with the line. You donít want to fall in the hole. You fall in the hole, you call out for help that second. We have to complete a unit every seven minutes. At the end of the line, none of the parts should fall off. If they do, we know who didnít put them on right. Donít let it be you.

6. I want to be able to see the toe tag plainly. Rip a hole in the bag to expose the tag. Go on, we havenít got all day. What does this tag say? I canít read your writing. Use a fat marker from now on. Make sure the drawer is closed tight. You donít want it to slide open and create a hazard for walking. Want to trip over a stiff?

7. Mistakes cost us, so get the order right. If Stacy gets backed up on french fries, give her a hand. If you see mayonnaise thatís gone hard, throw it out. Donít use it. Donít forget to wash your hands after you empty the trash. If you see puke or diapers on the floor, get the mop and bucket. Wash your hands after. And welcome back.

Submissions Contributors Advertise About Us Contact Us Disclaimer Privacy Links Awards Request Review Contributor Login
© Copyright 2002 - 2018 NightsAndWeekends.com. All rights reserved.