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Now, more rollicking royal news.
The Dumbest Thing I’ve Ever Heard
For those of you worried about Prince Harry’s safety in Iraq, fear not. Harry’s fellow soldiers will all be donning ginger-colored wigs under the helmets (like it’s not hot enough in the desert) so that enemies won’t be able to tell Harry apart from the rest of the troop.
Yeah. Okay. Now the enemies won’t have to waste time picking out the redhead in the crowd. They’ll just shoot them all.
Don’t Leave Home Without Them
Prince Harry’s girlfriend, Chelsy Davy, party girl extraordinaire, recently gifted the prince a pair of blue Calvin Klein underwear. The prince was so touched, he has vowed to take the undies with him to Iraq.
Hey, are those Calvins army-issue? Are the other soldiers wearing designer skivvies?
If The Shoe Fits…
While touring the Persian Gulf with Prince Charles, Camilla, Duchess of Cornwall, forgot a pair of shoes she planned to wear in Kuwait. Despite the dozens of pairs of shoes that accompanied Camilla to the Gulf, Charles, ever the attentive husband (and environmental activist), ordered the Highgrove staff to find the shoes and have them flown to Kuwait within 48 hours. When the shoes arrived, Camilla decided not to wear them after all.
File under: What Camilla Wants, Camilla Gets.
Royal Fun Facts – Gifts
Hey, did you know that the giving and receiving of gifts by the Royal Family on behalf of their nation is considered to be an important aspect of the Royal Family’s role in developing relations with other countries?
Well, it is. Really.
Over the last four years (i.e., since Camilla’s been on the scene officially), the Royal Family has been presented with gifts that run the gamut.
From Russia in 2003: 22 books.
From India and Oman in 2003: 47 books, four chairs.
From Sri Lanka, Australia, New Zealand and Fiji in 2005: a blown albatross egg, a Maori ceremonial club, two pairs of sheep shears, a wooden spear head,
a box of tree ferns.
From the United States in 2005: two saddles, two saddle stands, two covers (I presume for the saddles), two pens.
From Pakistan in 2006: a 300-pound yak.
From Saudi, India and Egypt in 2006: a diamond brooch, a pair of gold bracelets, a gold necklace, an agate ornament, an axe and silver box, two swords (one for each of them, I guess), a silver cigar case, a leatherette box,
a model of a gold desert scene, several shawls and bags, a diamond lapel brooch, a silver vase, a gold tie clasp.
From the Gulf States tour (Feb/Mar. 2007): a gold Arabian sword in a gold-plated and bejeweled sheath.
From the Saudis (2007): a diamond and ruby choker (worn by Camilla, Duchess of Cornwall on her last U.S. visit in February 2007), a set of sapphire jewelry (we haven’t seen yet), a set of emerald jewelry (we haven’t seen yet, either), an Arabian stallion.
Other gifts, given by members of the public and other individuals include: a box of 32 mangoes, a fly swatter, a set of finger puppets, a beaded necklace, an amber necklace, a silver necklace, three silver enameled rings.
(Clearly, the Saudis give the best stuff. No wonder they keep going back there.)
My, goodness! You exclaim. Whatever do they do with all this stuff? Well, back in the good old days, it seems that any unwanted loot could make itself scarce, and no one would be the wiser.
But you know, as with everything else, there’s always someone who manages to screw up a good thing, and that someone is none other than Prince Charles himself. It became apparent three years ago that Prince Charles pocketed a cool £23,000 when his valet, Michael Fawcett (a/k/a “Fawcett the Fence”) sold off gifts the Prince received from wealthy benefactors. The Prince also gave less valuable stuff to members of the Royal Household, who profited from the Prince’s generosity. Ever since, the Royal Family has been banned from selling or exchanging their loot. Now, each item must be logged and either used by the receiver, displayed in one of the royal palaces, or stored in a warehouse. All gifts, no matter their value, have to be able to be accounted for at any time.
Charles and Camilla have been the main recipients of the graft--I mean the gifts--because they have done more royal tours.
The Queen has received mostly books of the countries she has visited and photographs of their rulers.
Even Prince William is getting in on the action. On his official tour of New Zealand in 2005, Prince William received seven t-shirts, eight baseball caps, rugby balls, two pairs of swimming trunks, three woolen hats and two polo shirts.
But no partridge in a pear tree.
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