The Woman Who is Always Tan and Has a Flat Stomach (And Other Annoying People)
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Sometimes, it’s just nice to know that I’m not the only one. You see, I don’t know the first thing about gardening or gourmet cooking. I don’t have time to scrapbook every minute my life. My car has that “lived-in” look. My refrigerator could probably use a good cleaning. Many of my meals involve heating up something that comes out of a box…or a bag. And I’m pretty sure that my neighbor who decorates her yard for every minor holiday is completely insane. And, thanks to Lauren Allison and Lisa Perry, I now know that I’m not alone.

Allison and Perry’s The Woman Who is Always Tan and Has a Flat Stomach (And Other Annoying People) is the perfect read for normal women like me—women who don’t have Angelina Jolie’s lips and who secretly hate those who do. It’s a light and hilarious collection of 50 essays about all of those people who drive the rest of us crazy—people like The Couple Who Write the Holiday Letter Telling You How Their Little Timmy Came Up with an Alternative to Fossil Fuels. Or The Woman Who Has Dinner Completed Every Day by Ten A.M. Or The Wife Who Actually Knows How to Operate Her Victoria’s Secret Lingerie.

Normal, less-than-perfect women will have no problem relating to Allison and Perry’s essays—because they’re all about people you know. They’re about all those irritating over-achievers and obsessive-compulsives who make the rest of us look stupid and fat and lazy. No one is safe from Allison and Perry’s careful observation—in fact, you may even find that you’re one of those annoying people. But even when they’re criticizing your behavior (in my case, my yarn addiction), you’ll laugh anyway—because, well…it’s funny ‘cuz it’s true.

Though it was written by two women (and it’s sometimes a little bit difficult to figure out which one is which), the book still feels seamless. All of the essays are written in a similar style: light-hearted, sometimes over-the-top, and almost always laugh-out-loud funny. And, as an added bonus, they’re all quick reads—just a couple of pages each—which makes it just the thing for the woman who only gets to read for a few minutes at a time (before her husband and/or kids find her back and start pounding on the bathroom door).

This devilishly fun little book is a must-read for any woman who’s ever felt intimidated (and irritated) by the woman who seems to have it all. Not only will it give you a much-needed laugh (at others’ expense, of course), but it’ll also make you feel better—because it’ll remind you that you’re not alone.

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