No Tacos, No Donuts
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This edition of Stolen from the Headlines covers a Taco Bell customer who came to a slow boil when he had to wait at the drive-up window, a man who was doing his best to nail a spider that was running loose in his utility room, a public spirited dog who is running for mayor of his hometown, and a man who made the wrong choice in morning goodies.


No Tacos Today
Originally reported by United Press International

A Massachusetts Taco Bell employee allegedly used a BB gun to shoot at a customer who became upset after waiting at the drive-thru window for an extended amount of time.

According to police, the customer and Taco Bell employee Steven Noska got into a physical fight about “no tacos or burritos.”

“The victim became angry (cause he was hungry) and parked his vehicle and went to the door (which was locked) and started to bang to get some assistance and make a complaint about the poor service,” the Springfield Police Department wrote on its Facebook page.

During the physical altercation that followed, the “victim” bit Noska several times. The 26-year-old suspect then went to his car, retrieved a BB gun and shot the customer several times before striking him with the weapon.

He gets points for not shooting anybody’s eye out.


Up in Smoke
Originally reported by United Press International

A Washington man managed to torch his own house while he was trying to kill a spider that was running around in the laundry room of his Seattle home.

Firefighters arrived on the scene after the man started the inferno with a lighter and a can of spray paint. The man initially attempted to battle the blaze himself, but he fled from the home after the flames got out of control. Emergency crews initially had to fight the fire from a distance because there was live ammunition in the home. The fire was finally extinguished, but not before causing about $60,000 in damage, Kyle Moore of the Seattle Fire Department reported.

The live ammo was a nice touch.


Good Dog: Good Mayor
Originally reported by United Press International

A canine candidate has jumped with all four paws into the Bay Area political scene by running for mayor of Oakland.

Einstein the dog of Occupy Oakland is seeking to beat out incumbent Mayor Jean Quan. In addition to the shepherd mix, there are 20 humans who are vying for the job. “He’s a very good dog,” the furry politician’s slogan states. “He’ll be a very good mayor!”

Unfortunately, Einstein’s paws have prevented him from filling out paperwork, so he’s not on the Oakland City Clerk’s candidate page. That difficulty hasn’t stopped him from setting up a webpage and a Twitter account.

“I like to run. A lot! I mean A LOT! So make no mistake, I can make it all the way to the finish line, and I invite you to join me,” he writes. “What gets under my collar is Oakland City officials not doing their job.”

Einstein the dog is my favorite politician.


Summer of Safety
Originally reported by Yahoo News

Seattle City Attorney Pete Holmes apologized for violating workplace rules by bringing bags of marijuana he purchased from newly-opened Washington state pot shops back to his office.

“When I brought the unopened marijuana to City offices—trying to keep up with a busy schedule—I nonetheless violated the City’s rules,” Holmes said in a statement on the city’s website. “At the end of the business day, I took the marijuana home and left it there, still unopened, before I participated in the second Community Walk of the Mayor’s Summer of Safety.”

Maybe he should have just gotten the donuts.

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