The Missing Washing Machine
Click here to buy posters
In Association with
This edition of Stolen from the Headlines covers a guy who likes to steal things from cars, a raft of citizens who found themselves on a police blotter, a couple of guys caught with a bag of stolen documents, and, for variety, a runaway dinosaur.

Car Jumping
Originally reported by

According to local officials, a 24-year-old central New York man who admitted to being involved in about 100 thefts has been arrested again after robbing a woman.

Auburn police say Kenneth Lafler was arrested after he jumped into a woman’s car and stole her purse. Officers say the victim recognized Lafler because he had been charged with breaking into her car two months ago.

Police say that, after his arrest in December on burglary charges stemming from the car break-in, Lafler admitted to his involvement in nearly 100 open cases in which items were stolen from vehicles. It couldn’t be determined if he has a lawyer.

Or a lick of sense.

Police Blotter
Originally reported by

6:59 a.m. A Columbia Falls resident called in with a log of his neighbor’s dog’s barking habits.
7:39 a.m. A resident on South Woodland Drive reported that whoever ran into his mailbox last night left part of their grill behind.
8:52 a.m. One cow was seen standing in the northbound lane of Highway 93 North.
1:50 p.m. An irritated resident on Helena Flats Road reported that a habitual nuisance was back in his white pickup, spinning donuts in the neighborhood.
2:16 p.m. A Whitefish woman reported that she didn’t actually see it happen, but she is missing her washing machine and believes that it was stolen. She was going to take another look around and call back if she still couldn’t find it.
3:34 p.m. A Kalispell resident wanted to know if it is legal to own a rooster, because the neighbors have one and it’s annoying.
7:15 p.m. A man called 911 to report that someone pointed a laser light at him as he was driving down West Reserve Drive.

It’s just one damned thing after another.

Pravda News
Originally reported by

Two Russians, aged 30 and 31, were arrested in the Gomel region of Belarus. The two men are suspected of robbing a pensioner, a native of the village of Mars. The man told the police that two men broke into his house and stole a bag with documents. The documents were found with the suspects during their arrest.

Very suspicious documents, being Martian and all.

Jurassic Garden News
Originally reported by

“Drunken hooligans” have been suspected in a dinosaur abduction in the Isle of Wight.

A model triceratops was dragged from its home in the Jurassic Garden in the village of Godshill and dumped in the middle of the street. The owner of the model beast, Martin Simpson, said he was shocked to see the model appearing on social media over the weekend.

The dinosaur is part of Mr. Simpson’s shop garden, where he sells prehistoric gems and fossils. He said: “It takes about five blokes to move the dinosaur a couple of inches, so it was definitely a concerted effort, and drink was probably involved.”

Our Isle of Wight sources (both of them) indicate that the keg came first.

Submissions Contributors Advertise About Us Contact Us Disclaimer Privacy Links Awards Request Review Contributor Login
© Copyright 2002 - 2018 All rights reserved.