Pet Rabbit Alert and Other Bulletins
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This edition of Stolen from the Headlines covers a group of people who are on the phone way too much, some dinosaur experts who need to get out more, a lady who would be well advised to choose her playmates more carefully, and two brothers who may be up for the next Dumb and Dumber movie.

Police Log
Originally reported by The News Review

12:39 a.m. — Vehicle on the shoulder facing the wrong way on Interstate 5 near milepost 84, Glendale.
6:22 a.m. — Three pet rabbits are by the school entrance of Umpqua Community College in the 1100 block of Umpqua College Road, Roseburg.
7:41 a.m. — Large marijuana grow making the caller sick in the 300 block of Diamond Rock Road, Tiller.
9:03 a.m. — Caller thinks he was drugged by his daughter and has been in the hospital in a coma since the incident in the 5700 block of Northeast Stephens Street, Winchester.
11:10 a.m. — Man and female “struggling” in the 400 block of Lane Avenue, Drain.
6:18 p.m. — Neighbors moved and left a large trampoline that isn’t secured and it’s flying in the wind and hitting the house near the intersection of Park Street and East First Avenue, Riddle.
8:49 p.m. — Fugitive is upstairs hiding under the caller’s son’s bed in the 600 block of Stagecoach Road, Canyonville. Caller is threatening to hit the man with a baseball bat if deputies don’t respond.

Ah, the real news...

Dinosaur Alert
Originally reported by The Telegraph

Scientists have discovered fossils from a new species of giant, long-necked dinosaur unearthed in northeast Australia, speculating that its ancestors had trekked across Antarctica some 105 million years ago.

At least 14 meters (45 feet) from head-to-tail, Savannasaurus elliottorum was a plant-chomping, barrel-chested member of the sauropod group, which includes the largest land animals to ever have roamed the planet.

The discovery, along with a specimen of another sauropod called Diamantinasaurus Matilde, was detailed in the nature journal Scientific Reports.

Paleontologists nicknamed the two dinos Wade and Matilda. Both species are thought to be unique to Australia. How and when these and other dinosaurs made it Down Under is a source of ongoing debate, and the new find is sure to add fuel to the fire.

They probably just took the land bridge.

Do It Yourself
Originally reported by CBS

Local police are pleased that a local woman has arrested herself.

Cara Greer, 29, called Sacramento Police saying that she and a friend who used to be a security guard were playing around with handcuffs, and she accidentally got herself stuck in the cuffs.

The officer did a records check on Greer and found that she had a felony burglary warrant out of El Dorado County. Police took Greer to a nearby fire station to have the old handcuffs removed, then took her into custody in official handcuffs.

Moral to this story: if you have an outstanding felony burglary warrant, try not to do anything stupid.

Just Two Wild and Crazy Guys
Originally reported by Yahoo News

Local officials have dropped most charges against two New Jersey brothers stemming from an incident in which one of them wore a bunny costume and repeatedly blew an air horn inside a police station.

The New Jersey Herald reports that the Sussex County Prosecutor’s Office will not pursue charges of harassment, obstruction, and resisting arrest against Kevin Hemmerich because of insufficient evidence. Similar charges were also dismissed against Jason Hemmerich. Prosecutors are still charging Kevin Hemmerich with disorderly conduct.

On Nov. 17, Kevin Hemmerich, accompanied by his brother, entered the Hopatcong Police Department lobby to turn himself in for an outstanding warrant. Kevin Hemmerich was dressed in a bunny costume and repeatedly blew the air horn. A police officer slapped Kevin Hemmerich after asking him why he was blowing the horn. The officer was charged with assault.

Jason, the brother who seemed to be a silent partner in this caper, explained that his clown suit was still at the dry cleaner’s.

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