Rampage Review
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In the mid-‘80s, kids could shell out their quarters at the arcade at the mall to play the video game Rampage, which followed the adventures of three humans-turned-monsters who then attacked the city and everything in their path. Now Dwayne Johnson tries to stop a trio of genetically-modified beasts in the game’s big-screen adaptation.

Rampage tries to save the world from monstrous devastation after the debris from a secret genetic experiment gone wrong turns three different animals into genetically modified monsters. Primatologist Davis (Johnson) just wants to save his friend, a lovable albino gorilla named George, who’s growing bigger and more violent by the minute. Davis is joined by Dr. Kate Caldwell (Naomie Harris), a scientist who worked on the experiment. And, together, they set out to find George and stop him and the other two monsters before they can be used to create even more destruction.

When it comes to action heroes, they don’t get much more lovable than Dwayne Johnson. When he stars in a movie, you know exactly what to expect—because he’s always tough and silly and just plain fun to watch. But no matter how big his biceps—or his cheesy grin—may be, he just can’t save this monstrous mess.

From the boilerplate setup to the corny dialogue to the multitude of holes and inconsistencies, the writing is shamefully lazy. Granted, the film is based on a video game from the ‘80s, so the laughable action and lack of a solid plot are somewhat understandable. But it’s really too bad that the writing team couldn’t come up with a story that makes just a little more sense. The plot is minimal, and the characters are ridiculous—from sinister villain Claire Wyden (Malin Akerman) and her bumbling brother and business partner, Brett (Jake Lacy), to Jeffrey Dean Morgan’s Agent Russell, who seems to have accidentally stumbled in off the set of a kooky Western parody. Even Johnson struggles—because, other than a few moments of bicep-flexing action and some cute scenes with his lovable gorilla buddy, he doesn’t get a whole lot to work with.

Of course, if you’re just really in the mood for a whole lot of gigantic monster action, you’ll find plenty of that here as the trio of genetically modified beasts converges on Chicago and spends much of the film wreaking havoc. But it all just feels like a cheesy late-night B-movie.

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